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The clipping this text was read from
The clipping this text was read from

offended at the sight and anticipated the letters to the editor that we would receive at the paper. I sympathized with their outrage.

The fact that the cowboy’s words were incomprehensible and the patriotic chicks in the background had perfectly vacant expressions added to my distaste. “Well, this is perfectly awful,” I stated simply, and cut out a few Valentines.

When Janet Jackson returned — this time from the bowels of the earth — I was completely in the dark about whether or not I was supposed to be inspired. She was dressed in some shiny gladiator thing and I couldn’t understand what she was saying, either. I think at one point she sang about illiteracy being a bad thing, so I figured the inspiration was switched on.

Justin Timberlake — who, I understand, is a former singer for one of those one-size-fits-all boys bands and a former boyfriend of Britney Spears — came on stage to join Janet Jackson. I couldn’t understand him either, but I think we were supposed to get the idea that he liked her. They kept grabbing at one another.

By this point in the pro

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