Kim into the marriage bed; this is unavoidable.

Kim into the marriage bed; this is unavoidable.

Hie combination of these experiences and a person’s upbringing make for a certain set of expectations about marital intimacy.

Your expectations can never really be identical to those of your partner.

Thus, give and take and a lot of understanding must predominate in the bedroom. It might sound silly at this stage of your relationship, but sexual intimacy will not always be the dreamy, glowing fantasy it seems now.

Sexual roles change with people, and it requires work to keep in synchronization with this facet of your lives as well as all others.

While it requires some thought, planning and consideration to grow with these changes, sex should never become a chore, but always remain a wonderfully important part of your marriage.

And, if the subject has not yet been broached, the issue of AIDS and AIDS».testing should be dealt with well before you tie the knot.

•CHILDREN. You’d be surprised how often this subject is neglected until it’s either too late to make a decision, or the decision has already, in a sense, been made for a couple.

Prospective mates need to discuss the concept of “family life” as they see it; do you want two children, or six?

Do you want them to be raised the way you were, or not? When would it be most financially safe to have children?

Should the wife return to work after the children reach a certain age, or stay at home with them through high school ?

These are among the most basic questions to be considered. Religion, value systems and the marital relationship itself all come into play when children enter the scenario.

Husband and wife may unconsciously nurture wildly differing notions of child-rearing, which will invariably cause trauma it not dealt with in a mutually satisfactory manner early on.

•IN—LAWS. The old saying goes that when you marry a person, you also marry a family. In some respects, this is true.

See Counsel, Page 8