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By JAMES J. KILPATRICK * I’niversal Press I The Great Simile Contest of 1993 is’over, and the tidying up begins. Let me sift through the debris. »The contest sought similes for “slender” and “exciting.” In the first division, the winner was, “as slender as;Cinderella’s ankle.” In the second division, “as exciting as a poached
. What made them winners? They wfcre original, they evoked universal images, and they were not flawed by unnecessary words. * We had several ankles among the 20,000 entries: as slender as a herofi’s ankle, as slender as a tall blonde ballerina’s ankle, as slender as the ankle of a race horse, and so on, but only Cinderella’s ankle se’emed exactly right. In the mind’s eye we see the prince bowing, and Cinderella extending her foot, and everything clicks into place. ' The best similes have a sense of cadence. From Bellingham, Wash., came this Simile Sarcastic: “As exoiting as the slides of an Iowa vactjon.” The trouble was that “Iowa” didn't fit. Meaning no offense to Manhattan or Topeka, I have to suggest that “Kansas” would have iml»roved the line: “as exciting as the slides of a Kansas vaction.” The twos{yliable “Kansas” contributes to a dactylic foot, and dactyls make lovely pets and quiet companions. \ One afternoon 1 was poring over the “exciting” entries. At least 200
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